December 29, 2016 2:20 am
I had a bad fire 3 months ago (September 24, 2016) that destroyed two sheds right next to my house, and did such damage to Kitchen, Living room and house front, that recovery measures are still underway. I thought in early November that all might be finished by Christmas, but not so. The inside is almost done and will be just beautiful, but the remaining outside repairs will likely be done by the end of January or thereabouts. It is clear to me that everyone involved in helping me has been the kind of humans who care and go the extra mile to do things right at reasonable cost… the way we are supposed to be compassionate with each other. I realize that although I’ve had to handle many decisions and purchases beyond what I know how to do, I’ve definitely been LED by LIGHT. No other way to explain one right decision after another, one conquering of an impossibility after another.
My houseguest and I have weathered considerable inconvenience for such a long time that we often have one nerve left and someone steps on it! Moments of fear, worry, exhaustion and frustration erupt. Last night was one of those nights when I could not stuff a worry into submission, but kept awake with an incessant conversation going on, resulting in fear and anxiety. Finally I came awake knowing I must no longer lie there and suffer. I got up and journaled:
“Woke up feeling many concerns, fears, and doubts, and I realize I have slipped into the mode of expecting trouble.
Yet, I know I have felt sure when I said: “My Faith is stronger than anything.” It is! It’s not something I have to do, or have to have. It’s a built-in Gift of Spirit that comes with happening to be a visible “face” of the “invisible Living Light.”
But like everyone, I’m having a moment of thinking I’m separate from that Invisible Living Light.
So, in moments like this, I stop, get up from sitting or lying down and move to a different quiet spot. What follows is what I did at 2:20 am this morning.
It is necessary to “brake” the “broken record” of my thoughts this way.
I call on our Brother, Jesus, Divine Human, and Mother Mary.
I call on Archangel Michael, Archangel Raphael, Archangel Gabriel,
and Archangel Uriel.
I call on my Guardian Angel and All Angels.
I call on my guides and spirits and my Terry.
And I call on You, Light, my Beloved Source,
from Whom I emerged and continue evolving.
You are our Source, from you we all came, individually and collectively,
and to you we return.
We are the Whole Circle of You.
I open my heart, mind, body and soul to you, Light. I ask for help from all on whom I have called during this night of fear. I ask you, Light, to accept my gratitude for every second of Life-Breath you have shared, My Life-Breath that you are. And I am grateful for the knowing that You are Bigger than ALL, yet You are who I am, and I am all that you Are.
You are my All in All.
You are the Life living my life, and living through the aftermath of the fire.
You are the same Source that sees everyone in the area as Your visible way
to be a Divine, Healing Presence in our world.
It is You, Light, who make us One and therefore make us Love.
For You are Infinite, endless Love.
I have no one to fear.
I am feeling better now. I feel your Peace , the Light of You, in fusion
with every cell of my body and with my breathing.
I have nothing to fear. In fact, it is necessary at this time for all of us to live as One, for that is what and who we are: One. We are each other, in You, for it is You who are moving on the land, with and within all creation, and You are the Link of all creation to Divinity.
Beloved Light, I am feeling Your calm and I am filled with gratitude as I immerse into sleep and the Peace that You are in this time of darkness and trial. I thank you Light for shining that I may see each next step, for you have done that. And each step has been right and good.
For it is You living this life I live.
And it is You who I am.
So I am the Great Peace and Deliverance expressing as human.
I am no less powerful, wise or loving than All that You are,
for All that You are is Who I am… in person.
I rest now, from my fear and concern, in You, O love, O light.
Thank you for knowing You as my Loving Source, and as Who I am.
For knowing that is knowing I am Peace, flowing like a great River.
Each person has a challenge as the old paradigm crumbles and is displaced by new.
I claim that in every bit of my recovery from the fire, I am You,
evolving Life, displacing the old paradigm with new.
Look at how exactly the right people have been on hand from the very start of the fire. How You were and are these humans acting as evolved humans, knowing our Oneness with You, O Light, O loving Source who is our Oneness.
I call blessings on all humans now, and on all creation as we evolve and make our way through the ashes of one way of being that has been up-leveled now to the higher Level of human Life… the level of knowing our Oneness and treating each other
with the Love that as You are, we all Are.
You are my Faith, and my Faith is stronger than anything.
As I have shared with others, we can and must let go of our clinging to our old ways of seeing things as they no longer are the Way. You are the only Way, Light of Love and Unity. You are all powerful Creator from whom all emerges and is ever emerging, unfolding and evolving.
You are our All in All.
Thank you! For helping me calm down this night. As this year of 2016 draws to a close, so does my old way of fearing what I do not know, fearing what others might do to me, fearing how others might hurt me. Fearing loss of money and material things. Fearing loss of my home and comfort and peace. You are all Comfort and Peace and You are who is sitting here as Di, as me, typing and calming down.
I stop now, with a grateful, peaceful heart, and stop this typing, stop my thinking and expecting, and rest, now, in You, my Beloved Light, my Source. You are here with me and as me. And I am everywhere, with You and as you. As You love me, I love you and as you love all, I love all. Amen. So it is.”
It took some time to come to a stop, but I know this kind of “practice” has kept me aware that there is nothing impossible, nothing that cannot and will not be resolved by that Life which is my Life, yet is Bigger than all Life.
I am held. I can rest in contentment.
And you can, too.
I’m not at a place I can chat much, yet, but hope to provide more for you who may be looking for a way to see more clearly with God’s eyes. Stay tuned.
Love and Deep Peace!
December 29, 2016