Di Lemon’s personal account of her “Either-or-Moment”
Transcript of recording:
“I was ready to end it all. My husband had just died. I’d always told him: “If you die first, I’ll have to kill myself!” Now he was dead and here I was, outside, literally on the ground with uncontrollable rage about having no money at all, once again! No money! That’s where I was. No food, no vehicle, not a soul to turn to, sick, and homeless! I didn’t know what to do! Then some kind of massive, invisible Force seemed to be zooming right AT me! Unstoppable! It was POINTING at me and RIPPED right THROUGH my chest and out my back!
I got myself up, OVERPOWERED with the message: “Money’s NOT the important thing! …GET THAT!”..
I stood really still, aware that I felt … Light. I was thinking: “I feel a little better.” I said out loud, to the air: “Well, I guess you didn’t bring me this far to dump me now!” And suddenly I was mad again, ANGRY! Because this was FAITH! ‘Where did this FAITH come from?!! I don’t have any WORTHLESS FAITH!!!’ And now I was back on the ground, weeping, sobbing in humility: ‘God, it’s a Gift, isn’t it? Faith. It’s not something I do. I don’t have to HAVE it. It’s a Gift of the Holy Spirit.’
Do you know what Tears of RELIEF are like? They don’t stop!!! Not even today when I remember it.
After awhile, Peace crept in … and I stood back up, calm now. I remember I wiggled my fingers, and wiggled my toes. And over the tiniest ember of hope, I breathed softly: ‘Well, my hands work, my feet work. I guess I’m gonna be OK!’ Now a crazy little laugh started gurgling up from inside and poured out all over the place! Laughing like a hyena!
Amazed, I thought: ‘Hey, I just laughed!’
In that moment, I knew I’d be going on in life.”
I’d LOVE to hear about YOUR either-or moment. Comments welcome..
and you can always reach me at firstname.lastname@example.org
May Deep Peace enfold you!